And I wrote to him that day...

I'm not writing about what you said while you were in front of the whole damn class. This isn't about you. This is about me. I didn't learn everything I was taught, and I wasn't taught everything that I learned.

Fr. Guy [Guibelondo, S.J.] has been bothering me recently. Other than the fact that I only learned that "Guy" wasn't his last name a few days ago, when he wasn't my [formal] teacher anymore, when I did the Creative Synthesis, I attached how to write Hamartia in Greek on it, and also, at the back, after I'd written my name (I didn't put a cover page. Hell, if you're gonna write something, a pretty design shouldn't decide its grade. Substance, not style, mi amigo.), at the bottom, of the page (he'll only notice it if God decides that he should), I wrote the above words.

It's really weird. I feel like because of my hostility and animosity throughout the quarter, I wasn't able to suck out as much experience as I could've out of his unique style. I certainly hadn't considered that I might not have him to suck experience from in the third quarter. Now we have this Hernando guy (Guy.... ugh) that I don't really know or care to know.

This is Fr. Guibelondo's (I refuse to call him Fr. Guy anymore. It's not like a student could just address Fr. Go as Fr. Johnny or whatever) introductory page on the Xavier website (who knew the damn site would have any use after all?)

http://web.xs.edu.ph/issues2/2005%20-%20September%201/Communities/Fr.Guy.php

Mr. Claro also recently (like, yesterday) asked me to submit my "Sino Ka Ba?" piece to Burn, which I really don't get. It sucked. Let me show:

Josemaria Claro: ey allen, why don't you submit your short story to burn?
Allen Yu: ? anong short story po?
Josemaria Claro: iyong ginawa natin noong unang markahan?
Allen Yu: err... wala po ata kasing kinalaman sa Xavier...
Josemaria Claro: Josemaria Claro: dapat ba may kinalaman sa xavier yung burn?
Sherwin Su: hindi [handy that he happened to ask this question, huh?]
Josemaria Claro: kung feeling naman nila hindi tatanggapin, hindi nila ilalagay e.
Allen Yu: ah
Allen Yu: o sige po...
Allen Yu: pero sa tingin niyo ba maganda siya? para sa akin medyo flimsy yung pagkasulat ko kasi ang tinangka ko lang gawi'y ilagay lahat ng mga damdamin ng ex-convict, at hindi na masyadong intindihin yung ganda ng pagkasulat
Allen Yu: what i mean by "maganda" is "mass reproduction" material
Josemaria Claro: hmm, e di gandahan mo bago mo isumite.
Allen Yu: ehehehe
Allen Yu: sige i'll see
Allen Yu: kailan po ang huling araw ng pagsubmit?
Josemaria Claro: content wise yes
Josemaria Claro: yung use of language, pagandahin mo bago mo isumite.
Allen Yu: sige po
Allen Yu: salamat sa suggestion

Other than Fr. Guibelondo, a lot of other things have been bothering me as well. Mr. Chua, for one, because he seems to be so unpredictable. I dunno. Scary.

Then I'm just hoping for Chinese class after Sem Break. I really, REALLY hope she gives back those essays we wrote. I really, REALLY want to see her comments on mine. It's the first major "composition" thing I wrote with any actual skill and effort. I want to see if I have any talent.

And then, of course, the thing with Jackie. Christian says he might be able to go, Char says she'll ask, Jackie says she'll go if there are at least four of us. Walt can't make it because he has to work at the office. Cath, Katan and Kenn are all out or will be out of the country. Argh life.

I miss her a lot, Jackie.

下雪 by 阿杜

就快要下雪　心開始凝結
該怎麼迎接　我們最後一個　聖誕夜
我害怕下雪　愛將會凍結
因為妳說過　雪讓人有等待的感覺

＃說好兩顆心要乘著雪　相約在那擁抱的季節
　冬天來得太狼狽　爽約了諾言
　白茫茫的世界碎成雪　所有快樂都已流成淚
　而我一個人面對　整夜的心碎

終於在下雪　意味著離別
我心頭的雪　不知還有多久才融解

repeat ＃

白茫茫的世界碎成雪　所有快樂都已流成淚
而我要怎麼面對　整夜的　心碎